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Transition! Transition!

That title should be sung “Fiddler on the Roof” style…

Tevye, Golde and their other daughters ; )

Ever notice how transitions (both with yourself and with your kids) are really tough? I was talking with a friend a while back about some behavior issues she was having with her kids. After trading war, er, I mean parenting stories we both realized that the majority of our challenges lay in transitions.It’s actually “a thing” with kids who have sensory issues (of which I have one-if I don’t include myself ; )

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S’s Occupational Therapist talked with us about them-although I have to say this whole transitioning thing certainly shows no mercy-we’re all victims! More specificity you say?

Here:

  • Vacation to School
  • School to Home
  • Grandparents to Parents
  • Pjs to “Clothes-clean-enough-to-be-seen-by-non-family-members”
  • Park/playground to Car, Stroller-anything that says “We are leaving now”
  • Having a Day off From Children to Children Filling Every Quiet Space You Just Had
  • Date Night to Putting Kids to Bed After the Babysitter you Paid to Put Your Children to Sleep did not Actually get Them to Sleep Before you got Home (feel free to grumble with me on this one : )
  • Looong Day of Work to Loooong Night Making Dinner, Managing Other Tired People, Cleaning Up After Them

You get the idea.

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So what do we do about these things? Endure? Dig in and find loads of patience? Well, yes-that’s what I do. I also yell, beg, remind others around me of their selfishness and make idle threats of never ever doing anything fun ever again. And, when I’m on my A-game I try to (these next ones will be in list form as to highlight what would be the best to do-notice how the other not so great things to do I’ve left tucked in between the lines-so if you are skimming this very long post you won’t see that part ; )

  • Play nice music or an audio book so no one talks to each other while transitioning
  • Speak in a calm voice (duh, right? Ha! Not so fast…SO much easier said/typed than done!)
  • Play a game
  • Be prepared in advance so rushing is not required during transitioning (i.e. lunches packed, pre-recorded calm voice ready to go…stuff like that)
  • Have a list (pictures for youngers) of things required during transitioning so as to avoid repetitive phrases (i.e. how many times do I have to tell you to get your coat! Of course the calm voice is always used here)
  • A hose. (I like this one the best for transitioning from grandparents to parents. This has nothing to do with the quality of grand-parenting and everything to do with the unavoidable side effects of generational transitions. Hosing off the children seems to wipe away any idea that the children may have of continuing the ability to get candy, movies and anything else they want with a cutsie voice.)

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What else??? This is where YOU get to chime in. Really. I would love to know how you and your loved ones handle transitions.

It’s warming up here on the farm!

La Gringa

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6 thoughts on “Transition! Transition!

  1. Excellent ideas! I like the idea of how much parenting involves the skill of helping children make transitions … move from one thing to another. When Jeanie was the Elementary School counselor at Shanghai American School (she’s in the high school now), she went to classrooms to lessons on “Transitions” because transitioning is HUGE for expat kids who in addition to the transitions you mention, also are transitioning from one culture to the next, and may be moving on to yet another one. With your background in Spanish, and traveling, you know what I mean. So yeah, transitions are HUGE, and I like that you have reminded me of how much of our lives–all of us–involve transition, and those who are successful in life, I suspect are those who’ve learn how to transition, who’s picked up some “flexibility” skills along the way, who’ve learned the Taoist skill of “going with the flow,” etc. etc.

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    • Yes, flexibility within transition seems to be key. With “S” having Asperger’s and being “on the spectrum” I think these transitions are made ever harder because of her inability to be flexible. Although you don’t have to have a diagnosis to be inflexible. I do best when my days are predictable. That’s just the bottom line.Thanks so much for your insight! Enjoying having you here!

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